Just call it an Oscar Meyer

We took Adam out to dinner a couple of weeks ago. We had a huge appetizer, and he just wasn't very hungry. He decided it was more fun to break his hot dog into pieces and slap them together.

Jared tells him to stop, to which Adam responds, "What, I'm just playing with my weenie."

Followed immediately by his justification that, "weenie is okay to say, it's weiner that is the bad word."

I almost spit the food in my mouth all over the table.

Any parenting moment I had was completely lost because I could not stop laughing.

It's sad I have the same sense of humor as 7 year old boy. Shameful, I know.

Adam-isms

After not being allowed to call everything "dumb."
A: Well then I'm just leaving!
me: (sweetly) Would you like me to get a bag for your clothes?
A: I'm not leaving this house, but I'm going to my room until after Christmas break!
me: Oh, great, can I have your presents then?
A: Well...I think I can do that part.

Adam's writing about Santa:
If I found Santa stuck I would get a real bulldozer and dig a hol that gos to the chimy and then get a rocket that touched his feet. Then I would light it and then he would pop right out.

Little Cowboy Fan

I got the rare opportunity to sub for Adam's class today. I relish any opportunity where I can get paid to be responsible for my own child.

Today, was Dallas Cowboy dress up day at his school.

Adam has this great team jersey, he's been excited to wear. Since the weather was cold I got him a white long sleeved shirt out to wear underneath it.

At school, while all the children were in the gym waiting for the assembly to start, I noticed Adam's clothing choice looked a little off.

I couldn't even see his jersey, because he had tucked it into his pants, and put the white shirt on top of it.

Clearly, he has his father's fashion sense.

I asked him to change, to which he refused because, "he had it on the right way!"

I left with a "I'm not going to argue with you about this -- go switch it around in the bathroom."

By the time I got back to his class from my supervisorly rotations, I noticed he was gone.

On my next lap, he had returned. I overheard him bragging about how awesome it was to a classmate, "Check out my jersey -- you can really see it now!"

...just so you know according to Adam, I'm still not right about the whole thing.

Serenity now!

Snowman Ornament

I'm prepping for Adam's class winter party. Here's on of our student projects. It's fairly easy & affordable project for a class full of first graders. (This is not my original idea -- I found the project here.)

Supplies: (Makes 24 -- all from Hobby Lobby)
24 plastic ornaments (glass works, but we used plastic for the kids)
Orange Adhesive backed felt
1 pack of 1" red pom poms, 24 pack
1 pack of 1" green pom poms, 24 pack

1 green felt, cut strips 3/4 x 12 inch
1 red felt, cut strips 3/4" x 12 inch
2 packs of Pipe Cleaners - Christmas color pack, cut into 4" strips
Hot glue gun
Anita's black craft paint
Pencil with unused eraser

1. Cut triangle shape from orange felt. Remove backing and stick on.
2. Take 4" of two color pipe cleaners and twist together. Dab a bit of hot glue and stick on the pipe cleaners.

3. Add pom poms with hot glue.

4. Remove holder and stuff white tissue paper into hole with an unsharpened pencil. (You can also use white crinkle cut shredded paper)

5. Replace holder. Cut 3/4 inch strip from felt. Carefully wrap and glue around the "neck" area of the snowman. It doesn't have to be stuck on perfect. Just add glue here and there and stick it on. Trim length if needed. Trim edges with scissors for fringe.
6. Dip an new pencil eraser into black paint and gently put on for eyes & mouth. You could also use black glitter glue, or a black paint pen. (Black sharpie wasn't dark enough on the plastic ornament)

Mexican Style Chicken & Rice

You will be singing my praises after you make this dinner. Right there, in your kitchen, you will do a little dance because this is so good, and so easy! Just 5 main ingredients! (Thanks Jessica for giving me another rockin' recipe!)

2 Chicken breasts (you can use left over baked chicken or rotisserie, shredded...or you could use canned)

8 oz. cream cheese

1 can Rotel tomatoes and green chilies, drained

1 can corn, drained

1 can black beans
Optional: Rice, tortilla chips, tortillas

- Cook chicken using your preferred method. Shred it into bite sized pieces.
- In a large pan or pot, cook everything together until cream cheese is melted.
- Serve over rice. You can eat it with chips or in a tortilla, burrito style.

The Check -up

Yesterday, I had my checkup.

I think my oncologist was playing the gynecological version of minute to win it. He was done before I even have time to formulate a joke about him upgrading to fleece sheets with our colder weather.

(Dr. M has the greatest set up for exams. No tissue quality paper privacy wrap there. He has great big comfy, cotton sheets. You can wrap that thing around you and know with a surety that no one is going to see your butt crack, or that you are going to accidentally rip the entire thing down the front in the process.)

Luckily, there are no signs of cancer. I'm back to 6 months appointments, which is a relief.

Phew!

The HOA Meeting

Tonight was our HOA, "who's in charge", meeting. I felt I should go, since I had forgotten the insanity of last year's near lynching of the HOA president.

I don't always agree with the HOA president, but she has good intentions that aren't always presented in the best manner. For example, we frequently get newsletters that demean homeowners for not making matters of the community their full time and support (i.e. not attending the yearly Easter egg hunt or decorating the entrance for the holidays.) I always feel like I am being chastened before I've had an opportunity to participate.

Then there are the surveys. We should have a survey to end surveys.

We had some guest speakers. My favorite was the animal control person who spoke on rabies vaccinations and told a compelling story about a wolf that intervened a pizza delivery and ended up having to be put down.

Like last year, this meeting became a forum for the brazen few. The rest of us were forced to listen to their ramblings. Here's some highlights from tonight's meeting.

"Who's in charge of the fences?"

"Who's in charge of the neighborhood sprinkler system?"

"Who's in charge of city park next to our neighborhood?"

"Who's in charge of fining vehicles that park illegally two miles from our neighborhood?"

"Who's in charge of owners that let their dogs poop on other people's lawn?"

"Who can I call if the neighborhood sprinklers are running, and it's raining outside?"

"Who decides that all the trees get planted near the fences, it seems to be city wide?"

"What do I do if someone parks the wrong way on my street?"

"Did that wolf get to eat any of that pizza?" (I wish I was kidding!)

These were all followed by a lengthy discussion of the ethics of allowing an option for homeowner's to allow the board president to vote by proxy on an issue. "Because one person having that much power is unethical!" It was truly ridiculous.

I now see why it is so difficult for the board to get a mere 10 percent of the neighborhood to attend, or send in proxy votes, to actually hold the meetings.

Apparently, they are all smarter than me.